Newest - Highway to Hell - DREEEEEEW!
Revenge of Your Favorite Terrible Stand-Up Comic
Got another one for ya. Rock ‘n’ Roll!
I suspect that, in Hell, they still have casual Fridays. I mean, given all the former heads of
corporations down there, some of that thinking must have trickled down, right? Am I right? Which,
I don’t blame them or anything; those demons are just guys trying to make a living in the torturing
and maiming business,
they deserve to let their hair down a little bit at the end of the week. You
know, wear a nice Polo shirt, Dockers slacks. And you gotta figure they’re going for those stain-proof
khakis, what with all the feasting on the entrails of unbaptized babies they do. Actually, those
unbaptized babies probably come with a Wet-Nap. I mean, just because you’re the scourge of all mankind,
that’s no reason to be unsanitary. And do you think they hit up the Hell version of 7-11 (which probably
looks just like 7-11’s here) to pick up those babies. “Oh, they’re in the back next to virgins who have
been sacrificed to Our Almighty Lord Satan. Yeah, right over there in front of the Slurpee machine.”
Cause you know they’ve got the Slurpee machine down there – it’s hot, man! And those demons might wanna
cool down, you know, after working up a sweat pushing soldering irons into the eyes of the unpure. Oh,
and how many people you think, when they get down to Hell immediately say, “Man, it’s like a sauna in here?”
Or maybe they say, “All those times I said it’s hotter than hell, I was right! I had perfectly gauged the
temperature of Eternal Torment and made amazingly accurate comparisons to it!” All right, maybe not too
many people say that.
Artist's rendering of Hell. That grim Reaper directs traffic. Parking's
not too bad, considering.