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Son of Your Favorite Terrible Stand-Up Comic

Rich Cerow

Got another one for ya. Let’s do this:
He only knows one word and its "shots!"

So, with Britney Spears being pregnant, I’m thinking we’re seeing a new trend here. Babies are gonna become the hot new accessory, kind of like Chihuahuas were for a minute there, what with Paris Hilton and everything. But is everybody gonna have time to wait 9 months to pop out a little rugrat of their own? No, of course not, not in today’s fast-paced world. Which is why I am taking advantage of this trend and starting a baby rental service. Hitting the club tonight? You’ll be the coolest guy there with a baby dangling around your neck, attached to a platinum chain. And we’ll customize things too, like putting you and the baby in matching basketball jerseys (the baby likes Kobe, from what I hear), or strapping mini-turntables to the baby for a crazy night with “DJ Dirty Diapers and MC Naptime.” I mean, there’s probably babies just lying around at the orphanage that you can pick up cheap, so the start-up costs are gonna be virtually nothing. I am so gonna get rich off of this.

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