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Newest - Highway to Hell - DREEEEEEW!
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Paths of Glory, Book 2: The Tesla Connection, Page 16
Rich Cerow
Half of this alien family will become slaves while the other half will be cruelly
ground up into fertilizer. And babies are rich in nutrients...
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Despite your misgivings, and your belief that your people could ultimately win this war against
the Zargon, you accept their offer to meet and bring about peace. After all, prideful victory is
not your goal here; you merely want this long, drawn-out war to end and peace to come to your beleaguered
people. Through their actions and words, the Zargon appear very contrite, and willing to call an end
to this silly, age-old hatred, much like dragons eventually learned to live in peace and co-exist with
unicorns before their mutual enemy, leprechauns, wiped them from the planet.
The Zargon's terms seem adequate to you. The war will end, and the Zargon will be free to live on
SR-388 along with your people. The Zargon will not use their planet-destroying devices (which heretofore
you had been unaware of) so long as you act as custodian in transferring all war criminals to them for
fair trial. This all seems perfectly acceptable to you, and you are in fact relieved that you chose to
meet and speak truce with them before they unleashed the Demonsphere, their globe-annihilating weapon.
Funny how you missed it revolving around your planet for these many months - you must have gotten it
regularly confused with one of your planet's three moons.
He's dashing, but enough so as to redeem himself.
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And so, time passes. The Zargon seem to live peacably with your people, but they quickly rise to
the top of the SR-388 political and social systems. At first, you turn over numerous torturers to the
Zargon, but eventually their demands for "war criminals" increase and you are funneling more and more people
to their spice mining operations to repay their debt to the Zargon through hard labor. Life is good for you;
the Zargons make sure that you are well-compensated for your work, and you only deal with the absolute uppercrust
of SR-388 society. Still, you feel an emptiness in your soul, as though you betrayed the very people you fought
so long and so hard for. And that is because you have. You are a slave trader and a disgrace. But the money
and the booze and the pills and the exotic alien women with green skin and antennae help dull the pain of your
soulless existence.
YOU HAVE GONE FROM BEING THE HAN SOLO OF YOUR PEOPLE TO THE LANDO
CALRISSIAN IN EMPIRE STRIKES BACK, AND THERE IS A TERRIBLE PLAN FOR RESCUING YOUR PEOPLE FROM JABBA'S
PALACE BY WEARING A BAD COSTUME, AND I'M NOT EVEN SURE LANDO WAS IN ON THEIR PLAN WITH THEM, SINCE HE DOESN'T
SEEM TO HELP AT ALL AND HE ALMOST GETS EATEN BY THE SARLAAC, FORCING A BLIND HAN TO SHOOT HIM FREE. PLUS, THEY
ALL JUST TOTALLY FORGIVE HIM WITH NO MENTION THAT HE SOLD HAN OUT AND GOT HIM FROZEN IN THAT CARBONITE IN THE
FIRST PLACE. SURE, HE BLOWS UP THE SECOND DEATH STAR, BUT I BET IF LUKE HAD BEEN FLYING HIS X-WING, THAT FIGHT
WOULD'VE BEEN OVER IN HALF THE TIME. SO, YOU ARE LANDO, THE MOST USELESS, BACKSTABBING STAR WARS CHARACTER.
THE END.
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